Mindset & Boundaries

“Once your mindset changes, everything on the outside will change along with it.” - Steve Maraboli

Once you change your mind, you will change your life. This is why the first thing that I love to address while working with clients is their mentality and perception toward their body, soul, and life. Your mindset is a necessary component to focus on if you want to optimize your health, finances, career, relationships, and your life. Understanding this concept can be the rate-limiting step of healing.

René Descartes was a French philosopher in the 1600s who is known for Mind-Body Dualism. His philosophy was based on the fact that the mind and body are intertwined, stating “I think, therefore I am.” The things we believe, say, and think about ourselves have a distinct effect on our bodies, either making us well or unwell.

American neuroscientist and pharmacologist Candace Pert stated,

Most psychologists treat the mind as disembodied, a phenomenon with little or no connection to the physical body. Conversely, physicians treat the body with no regard to the mind or the emotions. But the body and mind are not separate, and we cannot treat one without the other.

There is much evidence that points to the idea that illness is unprocessed experiences manifested in the body. Many individuals who experience PTSD or Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) have a greater risk of developing autoimmune diseases. A wide range of women, more than half with IBS report childhood trauma. It's why there's a higher prevalence of emotional, physical, and sexual abuse in patients with GI disorders vs. controls.⁣ This does not mean that it is your fault in any way. There is hope for healing. It’s deeper than the physical pain. Our beliefs inform our biology, and anyone is capable and worthy of healing—we just have to believe it.

I can attest to this proof. During my high school years, everything I’d eat made me bloated, sometimes all I wanted to do was sleep. My mind was constantly racing and causing me emotional exhaustion. I just didn't feel alive. But underneath this physical pain was a belief that I never liked to acknowledge. The belief that I was not good enough, that I needed to be more, and do more to earn love. So every day I was “driven to succeed” with the intent to do things for others, rather than myself. It took many hard conversations to get real with myself and attack the mindset that was causing my body to burn.

Boundaries are defined as A line that marks the limits of an area: a dividing line.

When it comes to reoccurring thought patterns that seem to think that they have a place, it’s crucial that we have boundaries with what and who we allow to fill our minds. Think of yourself as your own yard with a fence. What are you allowing in to take care of? Other people’s responsibilities? Opinions that try to tell you who you are? Think of your real home backyard or property, I’m sure you wouldn’t allow your neighbor to come in and dump their trash and belongings into your backyard. You would make sure they would take care of it rather than expecting you to clean up their mess.

My therapist used this analogy with me. Come to find out, I really had to go digging through my mental yard and clean out everything that wasn’t mine that I was choosing to hold onto. This led me to neglect my own needs and sure enough, live for the sake of others. The word for this is People-Pleasing, and it’s a slow killer.

But through the self-honesty and diligence of taking every thought captive and submitting it to Christ, (2 Corinthians 10:5) I began to develop a stronger mind that allowed me to see my body as a holistic masterpiece, or should I say, “Whole-istic”. Understanding that God created it like a forest, with everything stemming from the same root.